The perception problem approach

Correcting unwanted behavior in others can be intimidating. You want the behavior to change, but you don’t want to start an argument.

When confronting someone, use what Paul Falcone calls the perception problem approach.

Start your conversation by describing what the situation looks like from your perspective, and ask if it seems accurate to them.

You can use this template:

“Let me tell you how it looks from my vantage point. . . . Do you agree with my perceptions at least to some degree?”

Stating your experience or perspective makes them aware of the problem and how it looks to others without making it seem overly accusatory or objective.

It gives you a great framework for problem-solving during the rest of the conversation.