Set the table

Want a bigger donation, a higher asking price, or more alignment with your position? 

Robert Cialdini, author of Influence and Pre-suasion, tells us that cognitive scientists have discovered that people are susceptible to subtle signals, given before you even open your mouth, even if those signals are unrelated to your negotiation.

This is why smart salespeople dress well. Why politicians stand next to flags. Why people put credentials on their email signature files. Not only to impress but to associate. 

Want your negotiating partner to be open to a higher sale price? Chit-chat about the recent sale of an expensive yacht before you negotiate. Give the price of the sale, so a high dollar amount is in the other person’s head.

If you want your kids to do something nice for someone else, show them a YouTube video of someone being nice to a pet before you ask.

Asking for a donation? First tell a story of someone else’s generosity or benevolence. 

Pitching an idea to your boss? Tell the story of you winning at something. 

Share thoughts and images that will bias people toward a frame of mind compatible with your presentation. 

Meet in the most impressive space you can control.

Bring high energy. 

Pre-suading sets the table by creating mental and emotional associations that carry over.