Don’t hide behind “others”

Yes, “saying it straight,” in a way that’s well-received is not easy.

For example, as a boss, you may want someone to stop dressing like a slob in the workplace. One angle you could take might be to say, “There’s a lot of people who talk about the way you dress.” 

It’s tempting to hide behind “I’ve heard…” or “Others are saying that…”’ to make your criticism land more softly, or to protect yourself.

But there are a lot of unintended consequences of this tactic. 

For one, the other person is now thinking that people are gossiping about them. Not good for team dynamics. 

If this is your opinion, own it. Ask for what you want clearly, in a way that’s respected. 

With “others” or even “we,” no one owns it. 

Integrity is strength.