Say “no” without the dreaded word
Sometimes we want to say no without using the harsh word itself. Here are five techniques (super useful with children, but appropriate for anyone) to say no indirectly while still being clear.
Give a choice - “Do you want to finish the project today or Friday?”
Substitute yes for no - “Sure, you can go to Zhang Li’s house, as soon as you clean your room.”
Give information - “You could get hurt. How about you play touch football instead?”
Accept feelings - “I know you want to stay out. It must be hard to have to leave in the middle of all the fun.”
Explain the problem - “I know you wanted a raise, but we didn’t make our numbers this quarter.”
Use these strategies to lower resistance to your “no’s.”
And have a good weekend.
Adapted from Messages, The Communications Skills book, by Dr. Matthew McKay.
