But...HOW do I pause before reacting?
That tiny, sometimes imperceptible space between thought and reaction gives us the ability to prevent our emotions from taking over and controlling the way we communicate.
If you don’t have this space in the heat of the moment, that’s totally natural. No one teaches us emotional observation and regulation when we’re young, and you certainly can’t teach this skill to yourself when you’re getting all amped up.
Like an athlete, musician, trial attorney, public speaker, you must practice this skill off the court or stage, if you expect to be able to perform it in action.
Here’s a daily 5 minute game you can play to develop this critical life skill.
The Thought Catcher
Sit in a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed.
Count ten deep breaths to calm the mind and body.
Now pay attention to your thoughts like a catcher waiting for a pitch. After the thought comes, acknowledge it (maybe even greet it with a hello), then throw it back and wait for the next one. Allow yourself to not cling to a thought or push it away. Just acknowledge that it’s there and drop it, to get ready to catch the next thought thrown your way.
This game is actually based on an ancient meditation technique, and in addition to widening the gap between thought and reaction, it will yield one other huge benefit to your thought patterns, but I’ll let you figure out what that is by trying this for a week, and seeing how you change.
