Asking for donations
In our workshops, we teach that when making a request, one important way to increase the chances of success is to find mutual objectives, so your needs and the other person’s needs can both be met. But, what can we do when there’s no clear way to find mutual objectives? Raising money and charitable giving is a good case study to examine the question: what if I can’t find a way to meet the other person’s needs with my request?
The common approach when we ask others to donate their hard-earned money is to appeal to their sense of altruism, or explain why the cause is important to you. While it is true that some will give out of the goodness of their heart -- either they believe in the charity or because they want to support you -- this doesn’t mean they’re not fulfilling a basic human need by doing so.
Greg Bowden, a fundraiser who negotiates major gifts for a living, says that when giving, “there’s always a public good and a private good. The public good might be the hospital building, or cancer research that’s being funded. The private good might be the person’s feeling that they’re helping or doing the right thing.”
With this in mind, let’s look at our list of basic human feelings and needs, and we can see that giving charity does in fact satisfy several real needs, including the need for self-worth, meaning, and contribution.
This is why, when asking for donations, it’s important to clearly articulate:
How their money will make a difference in the world (the need for “contribution to the enrichment of life"),
Proof or assurance that the money is being used wisely (the need for trust & honesty), and
How, if they want, the donor will be recognized for their actions (the need for consideration).
These are appeals not to someone’s altruism, but to their own needs, which will be fulfilled by giving. While you won't necessarily tell them their needs are being met, they’ll know, by the way this “informed giving” makes them feel.
