The closest you’ll get to a Jedi mind trick

In Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It, we learn about Richard Wiseman’s psychology study of restaurant workers creating connection with patrons.

First, he asked waiters to use positive reinforcement when taking customer orders, with phrases such as “great,” “no problem,” and “sure.”

Then, he asked the waiters to use mirroring, by simply repeating back the order to the customers.

Which group do you think received higher tips?

I was surprised to learn that when the waiters mirrored back the order they received 70% higher tips.

Counterintuitive, yes, but it demonstrates a powerful technique used by FBI hostage negotiators that you can employ.

“Of the entirety of the FBI’s skillset, mirroring is the closest one gets to a Jedi mind trick,” the authors write.

Simply repeat back to the speaker the last three words or the critical one to three words they said.

Some may call this manipulation. I call it influence.